4.02.2005

A Big Morning for Thoughts

Today's birthdays: there are four...to Mama II, Neesha, V.R.E., and R. Ballard... I wish you all a happy birthday!

I am trying to figure out how to write this blog with while maintaining an ample about of discretion, but this is my blog so I guess I don't have to, right?

This morning I woke up to one thought, and I am not sure why the cognition randomly surfaced. That desire is not present right now; a repeat is not immediately warranted, thusly I am not quite sure why it was even a thought this morning. Maybe the question should be, will a repeat ever be desired? and even if it is would it ever be obtained? That lack of apprehension? That enormous amount of trust? That level of intensity? That length of time? Could the wantto that was satiated that day be satiated again?

Looking back on that encounter, I definately realize that it was an exhibit of the greatest kinship of all times for me, for us, for them, but why think about it today? Why did my subconscience say that today would be the day I relive that moment--those fleeting moments in my dreams and at the commencement of this new day? Maybe because in order for this thing to work, most days would need to be that wonderful, most moments that fleeting; and my id was telling me that if most days are not like that day then any attempt to maintain a kinship void of that intensity and intimacy is futile and expendable.


thank you for giving me something to write about whether good, bad or indifferent

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